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Thursday, October 11, 2012

Smashed Melon

Pain. Why must you remain?
The sun's too bright . . . I like the rain.
             Everyone thinks Im insane, but its pain.

Tired -- but also so wired!
If I could get a job I would be fired.

It's hard to cope when you're losing hope.
Do you want to go?  I have to say No!

When will it end? I don't have a friend . . .
            my head needs to mend.

It's hard to fight when you can't stand the light.
There's others like me, all stuck up a tree --
            no, maybe a cave, to this illness I am a slave.

I'm losing my fight, 'cause I can't sleep at night.
I'm up and I'm down . . . my face growing a frown.

People so rude!  I've gotten a bad attitude.
People think you're lazy and crazy,
             my eyes are all glazy.

I'll pop the pill, to get the will, to climb the hill.

PAIN . . .

My eyes always red, a metal bar through my head!
Yeah -- I know what was said, these feelings I've read.

I wish it would all leave, and that they would believe --
it makes me want to heave.

When will it be gone?  It has been too long.
I will keep up a smile, but how long is this while?
              I fall in a pile.

Tomorrow will be better, so I can be a go getter.
Yes, I'll boo hoo from pain and my messed up brain,
              I'm glad for the rain.  

I can.  I can still love, I can still smile.
And at times the pain goes for awhile.

Life is not lost, but I've paid a high cost.

The Laughter is still here, although not as clear,
               but I'm losing my fear.

                           Kind of ironic in a great way....NO HEADACHE TODAY!!!


My wonderful, loyal friend, Lori, shared this poem that she wrote.  Lori is a creative jewelry artist that loves life, gardening, and people.  She has a clever sense of humor and is compassionate with others; Lori has been a wonderful support for me even though her own days are so challenging.  She is a beautiful and sensitive woman and has been ill with fibromyalgia and other complications since she was in her teens . . . for about 31 years.

3 comments:

Mari said...

That was an amazing poem. I'm sorry for you and Lori. I believed I had Fibro, my doctor diagnosed Depression. They are so very similar.
I send you hugs from another who understands. Once again loved the poem

Lori said...

Thankyou Mari!, If your symptoms persist and you feel they are more then depression seek another opinion.Many drs.still dismiss many chronic illness' as depression especially in woman.If not,then I hope your depression lifts. Take care of yourself and stay strong. Lori

Unknown said...

Hi Mari, Thanks so much for your concern and kind words! Fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome are difficult to diagnose and are generally dismissed as depression especially in women. If a doctor does not have experience with fibromyalgia they will give the patient another diagnosis, which is generally a behavioral health diagnosis. Don't hesitate to seek another opinion from a rheumatologist that treats fibromyalgia if your symptoms don't improve with an antidepressant. Blessings to you in your journey to wellness! Warmly, Valda